Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Confessions of Guilt from Dan Graves - Installment #7

I walked home in a penguin suit once.  And I don't mean a tux, I mean a bona-fide penguin suit.  It was blue, had a cut-out for my face, and a little whirly-bird hat on the top.  It was made of a kind of cheap fleece.  The arms didn't have any cutouts for hands...you had authentic looking penguin flaps...which made the very long zipper in the back very difficult to maneuver.  Combine this with no pockets, and suddenly it's very difficult to pay for drinks, hold on to drinks...or even hold on to your dignity for that matter.  Anyway, I walked home approximately 9.1 kilometers in this suit, which required double the amount of steps 9.1 kilometers would normally require as the penguin suit crotch began at my knees.  I was quite a sight.  Unfortunately this was a rather warm Halloween in Japan, so under a fleece suit you would typically go boxers only...so I had to do the whole stretch with the suit on - at 3am.

There are some mighty unruly types floating around the streets of Japan at 3am; but I can tell you this:  they all seem to
like penguins.

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